But, They Haven't Touched Me | How To Handle a Loved One With a Mental Illness | p3
Updated: Jan 31
Signs of Emotional and Mental Abuse in all Relationships...
"They haven't put their hands on me."
Abuse goes much further than just physical contact. Abuse is any sort of repeated mistreatment whether it be physical, emotional or psychological. So, yea, they may not be punching you and slapping you around... but the things that they're saying and doing to you sure as hell feel like it.
Emotional and Mental Abuse looks and sounds something like:
"You're such a weak person."
"You can't do to me what I do to you."
"It was a joke, you're too sensitive."
"I just did it to see how you'd react."
"You'll never be as good as ____."
"Do what I say."
"If you don't do this for me our relationship isn't what I thought it was."
The list goes on and on. It can range from small attempts of manipulation and control to full out name calling, body shaming, and foul jokes that tend to involve your insecurities and weaknesses. An emotionally abusive person is skilled in the art of making you feel guilt for feeling anything at all. They may threaten to leave your life over and over as a way of getting you to feel like you need them around.
Ever been blocked for no reason?
Ever had your phone calls rejected back to back until they felt like picking up?
Have they ever embarrassed you in public knowing you wouldn't defend yourself?
Have you ever found yourself apologizing for your reaction to their behavior?
Do they do wrong things and still tell you they love and care for you
Situations like this tend to cause and aid in anxiety and depression. Not being sure of when they'll have an outburst and start saying more hurtful things, not understanding why they "love" you and continue to hurt you, not being able to detach yourself from them...
Therefore, someone on the outside looking in should understand that "even though I need to leave and part of me wants to leave, there is another part of me that is using this individual as a vessel...at this point, that part of me needs that person in order for it to survive." So, telling me how "crazy" or "insane" I am for staying is doing absolutely nothing to help.
Drag. Me. Out.
Grab me the hair kicking and screaming!
Whatever the hell you gotta do to save me, do it.
Favor, Peace and Blessings,